Deborah Schamoni

girl on the beach talking on the phone:

actually I look back
and I think wait
you knew so much
I didn’t even really fully appreciate it honestly back then I wasn’t even thinking I was just likeoh
but like
he’s not
like continuing the conversation
you know what I mean
I felt like kind of
used
but I realize
your so...
you actually know music incredibly well!

boy on the other end of the phone: inaudible

girl:
no i think you do
no no no you definitely do
like I swear to god I
have not met...
I’ve gone to record stores with plenty of people and none of them have like
genuinely been interested in like knowing so many artists. I don’t know
thats what I think
but what’s my point
but what’s my point aussie
I don’t know
but
ok
listen
I want to be your friend
whether you like it or not
because I decided I’m going to be your friend because I see so much potential
so much potential
and you know don’t be scared of like older kids like I know you were like that in high school
and was like oh my god like david jr. just did...
I’m like fuck that.I’ve talked to adults
you’ve talked to adults all your life like you know...

boy: inaudible

girl:
but why are you laughing its true

boy: inaudible

girl:
no it’s nothing you did
its what I... I guess
listen aussie listen
I guess I just like changed
I thought like literally
I was kind of in a bad place
like
I took a year off
because
honestly
I was not in the best place
um
mentally
and I could not stop
smoking, I was in a really bad place
and like um don’t tell this to other people I I just like
I literally like
stoped
I don’t even know how to describe it
I was like
and then I realized
like I became really really depressed
um
and then
what else happened
and then I took the year off
and then I went
you see
everything had changed
but then like
I kinda just
when i was younger
like I loved Jane Austen
you know
I genuinely did
I loved her
because
she was so
she was so like
just herself
you knowshe was
hmm
I don’t know what i’m trying to say
but i guess i just thought about you because I really thought
I mean I think you’re a really cool person and I respect...

boy: inaudible

girl:
wait you can’t hear me...

boy: inaudible

girl:
no what I’m trying to say is
I think you are really cool
and I saw that with you
and I saw that with the T’s
and I know
like so many
like high school kids
all these like random kids and they’re like ‘oh yeah bro there’s that guy’ like they don’t have much substance
like they just like
I don’t even know
or like at least not like where they show it
but you
you do.
all the kids in my high school
like i can tell you
i look back and like
all of them
but this might be different from you
but in my high school
it was like all
I’m gonna be honest
it was a bunch of
like really rich spoiled brats
so like obviously thats like different
but i was like
oh god
I have to fit in
I came from europe
and like I wasn’t used to it
and then I like
started buying
and like trying to fit in
trying to
but then I’m like why am I trying to fit in
like
I was so insecureall the time
and it didn’t really do any good
like
and i think
honestly
I think you are insecure
but i think thats fine
I’m insecure too
but I
everyone is
but I think that like
um
I’m just gonna say it
I’m gonna be your friend
and i’m gonna actually try to help you
like honestly tell you what I think
so i’m gonna say one thing
ok if your trying
this is from a girls perspective
ok
this is from a girl who’s had experience
I’ve had a boyfriend for a few years
like I know
if you want a girl like whose had a boyfriend or not
that doesn’t matter
if you want a girl
you have to go after her
you don’t have to go after her but you have to like make her feel special you know?
you have to
like i remember
I had to ask you
I was like oh
do you like that girl on instagram?
I know that was really superficial
like its just like what she looks like
but you met her in person
and you liked her
she was nice
I remember saying like well
like
like
like what are you gonna do
and I was just thinking
at the time I didn’t really think that much about it
but I looked back
and I remember you were like
like yeah if I run into her maybe in like six months
then no
why do you wait
right?

boy: inaudible

girl:
yeah and thats ok
thats fine
but I’m just saying
thats perfectly fine
but I’m just saying
like
thats the thing
like
I’m the one who
whose saying go
like everyone doesn’t know what to expect
and thats like the beauty of it
you don’t have to be worried about
like
like oh are kids gonna like me cause
the right ones are gonna like you
people of substance like that see
like that your really cool
even
your so much cooler than like most kids in my high school they all
all they talked about was like
like
no this was fine but
all they were talking about
is like oh who was hot
oh like was like that was it
and like oh
what does he do that was none of it
none of it
and like
I don’t know
I mean
like I guess
even if you wanted to casually hook up with someone
I still think like
you should
um
you should make them feel special
and you shouldn’t like say
oh yeah I just wanna hook up with like someone casually like when you said that
that was like such a turn off
and I didn’t want a relationship
at all
I like would’ve been fine with like
honestly like
I dunno if you even meant me
but that doesn’t really matter (laughter)
that doesn’t really matter
the point is
the point is aussie
umthe point is
I will try to help you
um
cause I do think you have
yea
I think you’re
a really
cool person
and
just know that you already have one friend
who genuinely
thinks that your interesting
and like
honestly before
like
I was like trying to be a different person
I was wearing like topless shirts no i wasn’t topless i mean braless shirts and I was like trying to be cool
like wearing ripped jeans
and like thats why like
I was just trying to be someone I wasn’t
because I was like confused
like I was like I didn’t know
um
and thats fine too
but like
just own it
you know
so when I like
when a girl asks you like
‘oh so like what are you interested in’
you say like what your interested in
don’t just like ‘oh I don’t know’
like
I’m not really
honestly just like
as if you were talking to any of your friends
and if they
and if they understand
like they’re the ones who you should be looking out for
cause like
it doesn’t matter if you like want a relationship or
like
nothing
like thats not the point
like if you want to like get a girl
then you
have to be confident
you don’t have to go after her
but you just have to know what you want
and you have to like make her feel
special
because like all these girls
all my friendsthey all like
honestly
they all like
I’ll give you an example from like a girls perspective in my experiencethey all just talk about guys that are hot ‘oh he’s hot, oh he’s hot, oh he’s hot’ but like
and I was the same wayI was like yeah
aussie’s really attractive
and like
I did actually like
that you were
like a musician and everything
but like yes
I like think you are very attractive
and I don’t think
um
yeah
I don’t think your confident enough
and I think thats something you should work on I know you’re shaking your head
I know it’s hard.

boy: inaudible

girl:
no its fine
its totally fine
like
honestly aussie its totally fine
its a lot to take in
but
just know that I have good intentions for you because I know what it’s like
yeah but
how are you?
(laughs)
no but how are you though?
how is everything? no tell me.
I’m curious
how’ve you been?

boy: inaudible

girl: you did?

boy: inaudible

girl:
no I don’t care I have timei’m at the beach
you know honestly i don’t even like to go swimming I like to just sit
and like think
so (laughs)
see I told you I was weird
no I’m gonna help you
(laughs) ok.

boy: inaudible

girl: show meboy: inaudiblegirl:
ok I’m gonna be honest who is he again ?
I forget
I forget

boy: inaudible

girl:
yeah but what?
Is he a rapper? I honestly don’t know I don’t really follow...

boy: inaudible

girl:
let me write that down I’m actually interested um
whats the name?

boy: inaudible

girl:
cause honestly aussie I don’t really listen to new stuff so
cause its kind of interesting to learn
but um ok keep going.

boy: inaudible

girl:
so what time period is that? Is that like greenday vibes like red hot chilli peppers like what vibes is it?

boy: inaudible

girl:
oh guess what
you know Parcels you know Parcels
oh I showed it to you remember?

boy: inaudiblegirl:
why did you say it was folky? it’s so beatles vibes.

boy: inaudible

girl:
Is it?
you really think thats all that is
but its so much more than that
think about how they are so like vintage looking they are so like their own person
The Parcels
it’s like these 5 kids that like
kinda like the beatles
they are like kinda foreign
they are like interesting
they have their own style
like don’t you feel like all these rappers
like kinda merge into one?
don’t you feel like
like who sticks out to you?

boy: inaudible

girl:
ok
but aussie ok
I don’t care about the tech I don’t care about the
I
I ask you
what what
ok like
whats your favorite song do you have one?

boy: inaudible

girl:
ok
what song do you like really relate to?

boy: inaudible

girl:
doesn’t matter
I wanna hear it
I wanna know
I want you to tell me so I can write it down something that is actually really like moving to you.

boy: inaudible

girl:
doesn’t matter doesn’t matter whats the song.

boy: inaudible

girl:
see! (snaps)
see this is it
when a girl asks you a question it’s good to have an answer
right
it’s good to have one answer
like what’s your favorite song, but like a genuine answer like why right if you don’t
I guess you can say I don’t know
thats also fine.

boy: inaudible

girl:
ok
ok “Something About Us”
ok
ok that one I’ll listen to that like later
ok honestly
oh god I’m at like 2 percent
umm ok
and the other one is “Itsy ghost” is that a song or like an album?

boy: inaudible

girl:
I’ll listen to it
I’ll listen to it
ok
just remember
just remember
you have one genuine friend.
And you can honestly act like whatever you want I honestly don’t really care that much but I will
I will be your real friend
because thats what I decided
and with any one else, honestlyum...who I think has potential. ok my phone is gonna run out but I have to go
bye nowbye!

Text: Ciccio & Marie Karlberg
Photos: Nicholas Venezia